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Literature Text
The town of Pokette had been buried in snow from an unnaturally strong blizzard, but now the blizzard was over and it was time for the clean-up to begin. There were huge piles of snow everywhere, blocking doors and trapping residents in their houses, but there was at least one citizen who didn't seem to mind the snow and that was Wyborn Bramblepelt, the absol with all the derpiness of a psyduck! Whether it was because of his thick fur, his oblivious nature, or a mixture of the two, it was almost impossible to phase Wyborn with cold. Pair that with the fact that he knows Flamethrower and has a very warm magcargo for a pet and it isn't hard to see how Wyborn quickly melted his way out of his house and made a path all the way to the town square.
Upon his arrival, he noticed quite a bit of commotion going on. Many other residents were gathered around the Town Hall and a lot of them were tossing snowballs towards the roof. Wyborn's first thought was "Oh boy, a snowball fight!" Of course, he remembered the town-wide snowball war that had happened the year before, and he was excited, thinking it would happen again. But what was this? Everyone's snowball fire was being concentrated on one particular pokemon - an articuno who had perched herself on top of the Town Hall. She was squawking loudly at everyone below.
Now Wyborn, as naive a derp as he is, knew that ganging up on one pokemon wasn't cool. In fact it was downright cold! After snickering at the stupid puns he'd just made in his mind, Wyborn decided that he couldn't let this injustice stand. Afterall, that's what any good superhero would do. He climbed to the top of the Town Hall and tackled the angry bird, knocking her out of the way of the flying snowballs.
"Come with me if you want to live!"
"Huh?!" She cried as she was dragged to 'safety' by an overly enthusiastic absol. "Like, let go of me, you peasant! Can't you see I'm a princess?"
"Golly, you're a princess? Does that mean I saved the princess? She's not in another castle or anything?"
"What are you talking about?" The bird huffed. "I'm Princess Snowflake Susie, but you may address me as Princess."
"Okay, Susie! I'm Wyborn! ~durp How come everyone's throwing snowballs at you? Are you having a snowball fight?"
"No, of course not! Snowball fights are like totes beneath me. They're just mad because I made it snow so much, or some junk."
"Huh huh! I'm not mad. I love all the snow!" Wyborn was absentmindedly making a snow psyduck as he talked.
"Maybe you're not mad, but I am! Jingle totes did NOT give me the iPhione 5 I wanted for Toy Day!"
"Gee, that's too bad, but I haven an extra phone!" He digs through his pockets and gives her his old cell phone. The battery is dead and it has no service anymore, but it's the thought that counts, right? Except, he had put no thought into it. Well, it's something, anyway. "You can call me if you need saving again! ~durp"
Susie just stared at the sub-par gift, not even knowing what to say. "Err..."
"No need to thank me! I'm just doing my duty! Huh huh, duty..." And with that he walked away, right off the roof and flopped in a pile of snow. Moments later, a shout was heard throughout the square. "I'm o-kay!" And this is how Wyborn saved Toy Day. I mean.. how Wyborn placated the angry articuno brat. I mean... how Wyborn did absolutely nothing of use. The end.
Just a little something. I wasn't going to bother and then I crapped out this pile of I dunno what 
It took me ridiculously longer than you'd think to write it. Well, maybe it's kind of funny, at least 
It took me ridiculously longer than you'd think to write it. Well, maybe it's kind of funny, at least I even forgot the word count >< 617 lovely words!
is mine! 
Susie Snowflake is © to 
Pokemon is © to Nintendo/Game Freak
is mine! © 2014 - 2024 Rapha-chan
Comments9
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The only way this story could be better is if it had references to pop culture, but even then this is difficult to beat! Very fun read. Thanks for the laughs~ c: